The thought of being trapped and wedged like pungent-smelling sardines in a tin can is not appealing. Not unusual to be crunched in the bus seat with another bus passenger— pretty normal during peak rush hour on Edmonton Transit Service (ETS). Too close for comfort if you ask me! It amazes me with the number of flagrant violations of basic bus etiquette. Let me digress with a rant describing this uncomfortable situation. Reminds me of an ill-fated relationship gone bad.
Back of the bus!
Here I am, herded onto the city bus with the other bus passengers: I whisk out my monthly pass of entitlement and show the sheepish bus driver. I immediately plopped myself down on the seat near the window. Unfortunately, I am followed by a large person with oversized baggage who immediately sits beside me on my bench seat. I am forced to shovel my backpack onto my lap without spilling my coffee and dropping my phone. What the “F@#$%&!”! There goes my personal space. I glare at him momentarily as he nearly collides with me. Whatever happening to going to the back of the bus? Okay, I understand it is at a premium once the bus starts filling up, but there is no need to violate it until necessary. Move along— no need to invade my space.
Personal space
The bus is slowly filling up with swarms of people and vacant seats are becoming scarce. I need my space, but I realize I forfeit my privilege and luxuries when I use mass transit. As much as I want to cordon off both bench seats, I concede my defeat and relinquish it. Crowding is the norm during peak bus times. You are not special and don’t have any entitlement. Feel free to read Metro, but when it gets overcrowded, that newspaper may be crowding your neighbours. When that happens, fold it up and put it away. If you are standing, you just don’t get to read. Get over it. Forget about blocking the seat next to you or reserving the seat for your backpack either. Just plain rude!
Don’t be a “bus-hole!”
This is not a good time to talk to your estranged Granny on your cellphone. The back doorway is not your nook or telephone booth where you can have a loud personal conversation. You are in the way and impeding traffic. Not to mention you are plain annoying! Another peeve of mine is the loud passenger who is determined to stand in the aisle to converse with a seated bus passenger. I am glad you found a friend, but I don’t need you shouting in my ear and blocking other passengers who are trying to get to the back of the bus. Respect and courtesy go a long way, people!
Don’t touch me!
Not everyone is the same size, but kindly fit your der·ri·ère into your own cordoned bench seat. Not so close. What is with that acrid pungent smell coming from your orifices? Don’t you shower or brush your teeth? Nasty. I made room for you, but please don’t breathe on me and refrain from having your grimy body parts rubbing against me. Frankly, I don’t know you and I don’t think we are at that next stage of our lukewarm relationship where there is “touching” involved. The cold glare I gave you didn’t give you mixed signals did it?
Most of the time, bus trips can be uneventful and quiet on ETS. However, there is always a handful of bus passengers that test my patience breaking unwritten bus rules and etiquette. No one likes being crowded on a bus at rush hour. Maybe I am a crotchety “old fart”, but this unpleasant experience can be much better if we just get along. Give me a little space within reason and be courteous towards each other. That’s all I ask.
